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Post by abbey1227 on Aug 3, 2021 2:07:50 GMT
After a year, I had too much time invested. He wanted to get married because he was 24 & living at home with mommy who turned his bed down for him every night & put his toothbrush out He cheated "every chance" he could. He never really understood the exclusivity of it. He was the same, just no longer living at home with mommy. He died couple months before our 21st anniversary, though we did separate at the 20 yr point. He took up with one of his girlfriends, moved out to El Cajon, signed a 6 month lease, but she didn't last a month. He went through the personals section looking for a replacement, but they all wanted stuff. They would sleep with him if he would buy them this or that. I think it was hard for his mom to admit I was better than all of them as I never wanted anything out of him. He couldn't believe there weren't dozens out there like me. He used to say I was a dime a dozen & easy to replace, but he found out. No. Mom was wrong & took it out on dad. Threatened to divorce him. I hated that. Dad worshiped the ground Mom walked on. She was totally shocked when the bishop that married us said that.
Whenever you fill me in on all those details, you really set me up to say some mean things. And I was young and goofy once......stuck it out with a young woman that was absolutely horrible for me. So I get it to some extent.
But I do not understand enabling that kind of abuse. It clearly still affects you to this day in a big way.
Good people get shit on and taken advantage of by bad people all the time. That's why the first group has to learn how to protect themselves at all times.
People are funny like that. They've all got their own views, truths, opinions. It's part of the reason you can never get them all to coexist in harmony.
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Post by merh on Aug 3, 2021 2:20:52 GMT
After a year, I had too much time invested. He wanted to get married because he was 24 & living at home with mommy who turned his bed down for him every night & put his toothbrush out He cheated "every chance" he could. He never really understood the exclusivity of it. He was the same, just no longer living at home with mommy. He died couple months before our 21st anniversary, though we did separate at the 20 yr point. He took up with one of his girlfriends, moved out to El Cajon, signed a 6 month lease, but she didn't last a month. He went through the personals section looking for a replacement, but they all wanted stuff. They would sleep with him if he would buy them this or that. I think it was hard for his mom to admit I was better than all of them as I never wanted anything out of him. He couldn't believe there weren't dozens out there like me. He used to say I was a dime a dozen & easy to replace, but he found out. No. Mom was wrong & took it out on dad. Threatened to divorce him. I hated that. Dad worshiped the ground Mom walked on. She was totally shocked when the bishop that married us said that.
Whenever you fill me in on all those details, you really set me up to say some mean things. And I was young and goofy once......stuck it out with a young woman that was absolutely horrible for me. So I get it to some extent.
But I do not understand enabling that kind of abuse. It clearly still affects you to this day in a big way.
Good people get shit on and taken advantage of by bad people all the time. That's why the first group has to learn how to protect themselves at all times.
People are funny like that. They've all got their own views, truths, opinions. It's part of the reason you can never get them all to coexist in harmony.
10 yrs.... Stupid phone has a mind of its own. Excuses, excuses, right? His brother committed suicide so excuse, right? Granted, he cheated all along, but again, excuses. He had brain damage from a motorcycle accident that basically made him a teen in his understanding for life. Not that I knew that when we married. I knew about the accident, but his family was pretty slow in revealing everything & put an abundance of blame on the accident when he apparently had issues prior. This world seems built for one group to take advantage of others. It was always interesting my clients committed crimes, but heaven forbid the idea of someone doing any of that stuff to them. |
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Post by abbey1227 on Aug 3, 2021 2:24:40 GMT
10 yrs.... Stupid phone has a mind of its own. Excuses, excuses, right? His brother committed suicide so excuse, right? Granted, he cheated all along, but again, excuses. He had brain damage from a motorcycle accident that basically made him a teen in his understanding for life. Not that I knew that when we married. I knew about the accident, but his family was pretty slow in revealing everything & put an abundance of blame on the accident when he apparently had issues prior.
This world seems built for one group to take advantage of others.
It was always interesting my clients committed crimes, but heaven forbid the idea of someone doing any of that stuff to them.
So much truth there, kiddo.
If you're not able to laugh about.......all you're gonna do is cry.
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Post by merh on Aug 3, 2021 2:29:25 GMT
10 yrs.... Stupid phone has a mind of its own. Excuses, excuses, right? His brother committed suicide so excuse, right? Granted, he cheated all along, but again, excuses. He had brain damage from a motorcycle accident that basically made him a teen in his understanding for life. Not that I knew that when we married. I knew about the accident, but his family was pretty slow in revealing everything & put an abundance of blame on the accident when he apparently had issues prior.
This world seems built for one group to take advantage of others.
It was always interesting my clients committed crimes, but heaven forbid the idea of someone doing any of that stuff to them.
So much truth there, kiddo.
If you're not able to laugh about.......all you're gonna do is cry.
My problem is logic. I know I am trustworthy so I expect those I care most for to also be trustworthy because it's easier. Earning back trust is much harder. However, dishonest people see that as being a sucker, but it also means they have to find new suckers in their lives to abuse. |
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Post by abbey1227 on Aug 3, 2021 2:42:47 GMT
My problem is logic. I know I am trustworthy so I expect those I care most for to also be trustworthy because it's easier. Earning back trust is much harder. However, dishonest people see that as being a sucker, but it also means they have to find new suckers in their lives to abuse.
So much of my late 20s and into 30s was discovering how best to eliminate a lot of wasted energy.
Ever since then my main problem is people often do not like it when I tell them the truth.  |
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